You explore inner emotions and feelings very well. The dialogue is well written and realistic and your predominate use of short paragraphs keeps the pace of your story flowing nicely. I like your inter-woven story plot and how you smartly build the characters of Paul and Rachel. Your descriptive writing makes your novel a pleasure to read.
A B
This is great stuff - at one point I had to scroll up to check whether it was fiction or non-fiction. I see it is fiction, but it is written so visually, it feels really credible. It's all so current as well with fame and people's obsession for it being so well documented all the time. This has so much more to it than meets the eye once you delve deeper. Fascinating. D P W
This is a very intriguing pitch. I liked your profile a great deal but it was with your chapter ‘Audition - Part1’ where I really got into your prose. You have such a punchy writing style and I mean that as a compliment. Short, simple sentences, uncluttered with flowery descriptions that can often ruin good page turning novels. Your dialogue is slick and perfectly propels your narrative. I couldn't find anything to nitpick in what I read.
C A
Great prologue - no mucking about with the opening lines, and the character is immediately accessible as an obsessive. By the end of the prologue we want to know what happened to him and the actress, and are instantly drawn into the story. Great stuff. Ed
